DISCLAIMER:  There are potentially offensive words spoken of Mr. Tim Tebow inthe post below that could be deemed offensive to some members of Gator Nation.If you are unable to hear/read such statements it is recommended that you avoidreading the following piece.   For all others that may be confused by the post,please click here –> satire.

Could the Orlando Magic be looking to make aSuperman swap?  According to a few high-level unnamed sources, Orlando GeneralManager, Otis Smith, is growing ever more frustrated with the lack ofleadership in his club.  As beloved as the jovial and good-humored Dwight Howardis to the Magic fan base, his inability to bring a championship home to Orlandohas Otis questioning whether or not he is the man of the future.  With Dwightlooking to spend his offseason making nicewith Shaq and playing Hollywood, the stereotype of Dwight as a kid that justwants to goof around will only continue to be perpetuated.  The Magic are saidto be looking to make the type of unconventional move that will help put themover the top.  If the team really hopes to achieve the highest level of NBAsuccess then there is truly only one option that they can plausibly pursue.Trading Dwight Howard for Tim Tebow.

It has long been said that spending just fiveminutes with Tim Tebow can change your life forever and the Magic ownership arenot naïve to that fact.  The Magic brass are clearly looking to piggy back onthe Tebow Charity Express in order to forever change the fortunes of thefranchise as they begin their 2010-2011 season in the brand new Amway Center.Though Tebow is practicing and working hard for the Denver Broncos who draftedhim 25^th overall in April, he still has yet to sign his rookiecontract.  Sources close to Camp Tebow say he is definitely open to returning tothe State of Florida and is fully confident that he can translate his heart andhustle style to the basketball court and most importantly, bring his leadershipskills to the Orlando Magic.

Measuring at 6’3” and abeefy 240 pounds, Tebow would generally be considered a mere overweight guard byNBA standards.  Luckily, Tebow writes his own standards.  You don’t think Tebrohas game? Think again.  According to playground legend, during the summer of2009 Tebow actually dunked on Lebron James during a pickup game on the meanstreets of Akron, Ohio.  There were initially reports that Lebron was soembarrassed by the Tebow dunk, that he had all cell phones, pagers and notepadsconfiscated and burned in order to shred every ounce of evidence.  You thinkthat 38.5” vertical leap at the NFL combine wasa joke?   Put Timmy in a pair of Shape-ups and in a few monthshe will without a doubt be able to replace the thunderous dunks of DwightHoward.

In NBA circles, the consensus thus far has beenthat Tebow is a bigger, less black version of Charlie Ward.  Ward parlayed his1993 Heisman Trophy into a 10 year NBA career, why can’t Tebow have the samesuccess?  During his college football career, Tebow completed 87% of attemptedjump throws shots.  Thiscould/should instantly translate into Tebow being the mid-range nightmare thatMagic fans have mistakenly brainwashed themselves into thinking that BrandonBass is.

DickVitale was even quoted recently as saying, “If I was a coach, I would loveto have a player like him on my team… To me, Tebow is the kind of guy you want,no matter what the sport is. He is the kind of guy who can take his team intothe winner’s circle, baby!”  If a basketball Hall of Famer such as Dickie Vgives the thumbs up, armed with his 34-60 career NBA coaching record, then theMagic are obligated to take a look.

And Vitale is right. Tim Tebow is a goldmine. EvenVegas is cashing in, lines have already been set over who can shed more tearsover the course of a season, Tebowor Big Baby.

This move would also allow for a rapid expansionof the Magic’s fan base.  With the fresh influx of Alachua and Duval countyresidents to the Magic Nation, the team will certainly be looking to expandtheir brand merchandising into the lucrative jean shorts and giant truck decalmarkets.  It’s been said that Orlando has been trying for years to penetrate thejort industry, but due to heavy lobbying from market leaders Lee and Wrangler,they have been unsuccessful.  Also, the Magic regularly run College Nightspecials throughout the season which will surely allow them to expand theirmarketing northward to Gainesville.  You don’t think that Tebow-drunk sororitygirls will flock to the Amway Center the same way they flocked to see the latestSex and the City movie? Like. Duh. Obviously. LDO, they will!  The marketingopportunities for the Magic and Tebow are truly endless.

With all of the rumors that are floating aroundregarding the Magic’s offseason plans, nobody fully knows what theever-mysterious Otis Smith will do for sure.  Will the Magic have the bravado topull the trigger on the Dwight Howard trade and make the type of move that willchange the lives of every Magic fan forever? Are the Orlando Magic preparing tobring on-board Gainesville God Timothy Richard Tebow?  If the belief in Dwighthas truly faded within the Orlando front office, then don’t be shocked to see anew number 15 in blue and white next season.